Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Landon and I spent a nice chunk of change on Samuel's crib nearly four years ago, because at the time, having never had a baby of my own, I assumed he'd use a crib. It's an American tradition after all, right? The first night home from the hospital with him, I knew I'd cosleep. The thought of putting him in another room was inconceivable to me. It took me awhile to figure out how to sideline nurse in the early days, but by the time he was a month old, I didn't even have to sit up at night when he woke, and both of us would go right back to sleep while he nursed. So, as it turned out, a top-end crib, mattress, and bedding set sat unused in the nursery until it was finally packed up and put into storage with the hopes we'd use it someday for baby #2 (Juniper).

When Juniper was on the way, I made Landon set it up when I was about 28 weeks pregnant in hopes that I'd maybe get some use out of it this time around. No such luck. Cosleeping has worked out so well once again that the crib has only taken up valuable space in Samuel's room and Juniper actually cries when I place her in it, even if it's only for a few minutes while I get Samuel dressed in the morning. I don't think she likes the boxy feeling of it, and the fancy mobile only entertains her for maybe thirty seconds. Plus, cosleeping is what I want to do. It's my parenting style. It's what works for us. It took me awhile to come to terms with the fact that I was never going to use the crib, mostly because of all the time and effort I spent at picking everything out (it's a first-time pregnant mom thing), but eventually I knew what I needed to do.

So, I stood by the crib this afternoon, looking at it and thinking hard about whether or not taking it down was really what I wanted to do. It was. Juniper was never going to sleep in it. When she gets too big to be in our bed in another nine months or so, she'll transition to a twin bed like Samuel did, so we have the ability to lay beside her while she falls asleep. Where we'll put that twin bed in nine months is anyone's guess. We're going to need to finish our basement to free up some more space in this little house unless Landon gives up his office. Even then, we're going to need more space.

I felt sad as I disassembled the crib, folded the bedding, and carried it all down to the basement. At first I thought I was sad because the crib was being packed away for the last time, but then I thought about it some more and realized that I wasn't sad that I wouldn't go through the experience of having a baby again, but sad that this time in my life of being pregnant and having babies is now over. There's a difference (I think). It's funny how we look ahead to these moments during the course of our lives, and before we know it, we are no longer looking ahead, but behind. So, it was with a little sadness that the crib was packed away this afternoon, but I'm glad to have Samuel's room back to the way it was before the crib was set up. He has more room now, and I was even able to set up the small tent he received from Landon's parents for Christmas from IKEA.

After reorganizing Samuel's room all afternoon, I needed some time to myself this evening. This wasn't even something I realized I needed until Landon insisted I was long overdue for some time to myself. I had to admit, it sounded pretty good. I thought about what I wanted to do as it was already nearly six o'clock. One thing that has been stressing me out lately is the weeds that are overtaking the garden in places, so even though it was raining, I headed outside for some quiet time in the garden in the rain. It was actually quite pleasant. It wasn't cold, and the ground was nice and soft; root systems gave way easily. The rain felt good on my skin, face, and hair. Before I knew it, I had a huge pile of weeds, and had formulated a plan to get the garden back to where I want it this weekend. This is going to require digging up another streetside bed, but what better time to do it than after a few days of hard rain. Plus, I don't have to dig the bed up myself. That's where my husband comes in. He's already agreed to get the bed ready for me on Saturday, and then on Sunday, I can transplant some bushes that are overcrowded to get the garden back into a balanced state.

I took a few minutes this morning when it was only sprinkling to snap a few photos in the garden. This columbine variety is in full bloom now. My other columbine has already lost all its petals.

Side profile.

Allium, from the onion genus.



The Ferriter Family said...

Karli, I soo wish we lived closer to each other!! Not many parents parent this way, yet it is such a great way! Emma actually did go to her crib at 10 months. Unlike Parker who went right to a twin at two. Emma going to a crib was actually kind of sad. She is very much a flip flopper in bed so I suppose it worked for all of us. Now she is just about done nursing at 20 months, and it makes me miss the whole baby stage. well gotta run! Later, Tara

Chelsea said...

Oh, how I wish I'd known that Zoe wouldn't use her crib either...I guess hindsight is 20/20. I had a pretty good idea I'd co-sleep, but you never know what kind of baby you're going to get - my little sister as a baby wanted to be in her own bed and NOT in the bed with my parents, where I had slept (which STUNNED my mother). So...I guess we can tell ourselves that we set up these cribs in case we had babies that wanted their own space so it wasn't a total waste.

Anonymous said...

Karli, those are BEAUTIFUL photos of the flowers in your have a photographer's eye. I think one of those should be your new header! :-) Also, I SO relate to the "mourning" of sorts that we go through as these kids of ours grow. It's hard to pack away each size of clothes as Em grows out of them! --Stefanie

Claudia said...

Love the flowers Karli!!! So very pretty!! You have become quite the gardener.

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