Friday, October 31, 2003
It is so cold in our apartment! At the beginning of the week, we set record highs for October, and now we have record lows a few days later? It's crazy, it is!

We didn't do anything for Halloween, and when the trick or treaters came, we didn't have any candy, so they gave us some! It was pretty cool. I didn't have to go trick or treating, but got a candy delivery! Pretty nice, since we only stayed in and watched "Fatal Attraction." I had forgotten what a great movie it is!

Well, I'm still studying like mad. Not much else going on here.

Thursday, October 30, 2003
I am halfway through the ninth page of my paper. I cannot write more than 10, because the professor refuses to read more than the maximum of 10 pages-which means-I'M ALMOST FINISHED!

For more on my paper, see yesterday's post.

Not much happened today other than sitting through 4 hours of lecture, and then sitting for the remaining hours of the day at my computer articulating, formulating, and finally typing my paper.

I'm tired. But, I won't be able to get to bed before at least 12:30 to 1am.

Wednesday, October 29, 2003
I am not as stressed today, because I have been making progress. This progress is happening because I'm working very hard. I will be burning the late night candle tongiht, but I'm hoping to complete or come close to completing this 10 page paper on authority in literature and the treatments of authority in literature by the following critics: Plato, Aristotle, Horace, Linginus, Plotinus, Augustine, Maimonides, Aquinas, Dante, Christine de Pizan, and Mazzoni. This is a very hard paper to focus and articulate my thesis.

Besides this, I need to read 150 pages of The Bostonians by Henry James this evening for American Fiction tomorrow. I cannot lend my thoughts to discussion unless I have read the material.

I finished Hawthorne's The Blithedale Romance, and overall I must admit it was a good book. The narrator was a little too disconnected from the other characters for my taste, but Hawthorne's overall style of writing is very attractive and enlightening.

I must move on-my paper beckons!

Tuesday, October 28, 2003
No comments for today other than I'm overwhelmed and completely stressed out beyond belief over upcoming mid-terms and assignments.

The car accident yesterday did not help matters.

Landon is helping with laundry and housework.

Monday, October 27, 2003
Well, I had a great day today-until I rear-ended some poor couple. It was very much an accident. They started to go, then slammed on their brakes, and somewhere in between them starting to go and my assumption that they did go, and then not looking back a second time to see that they really didn't go, I slammed into them. Their bumper was barely scraped, but it needs to be fixed, and my bumper is the one with the most damage. A claim has been started, and we'll have to pay the $250.00 deductible. It's too bad this happened-my first accident that was my fault. I'm just glad that the couple was nice about it, and that they were not hurt. I called them at home tonight to let them know the claim has been started, and they were really nice about the whole thing. I'm going to be taking my car in for an estimate probably Wednesday.

I did get a lot accomplished today on my paper about the treatment of authority in literature.

Sunday, October 26, 2003
As I said, I drank way too much last night. I was very sick all morning. At around 10:30am, Landon and I left to go look at houses, but I was nauseated and had a pounding headache the whole time. We stopped at Than Thao on Hawthorne and got some coconut soup and salad rolls. I could barely eat my one bowl of soup, and we left to go home. We were going to go see the ducks at the park, but since I was so sick, we just went home. When I got home, I started reading, but then fell asleep. I was woke up at around 1:30pm when Sharla called to see if I wanted to go study in the park with her. I was starting to feel better, and this sounded good to me, so I agreed, and we went to Laurelhurst Park and sat at a picnic table to study. I still had a headache, and was feeling a little nauseated, but was feeling better enough to go out. It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, and we had an extra hour since we turned our clocks back. The drawback is that it started getting dark at 4pm, so Sharla and I decided to leave at around 4:30pm. Landon was helping Susan teach a violin lesson, and was going to meet us at the park, but when he never showed, we just left. I went home and studied, and started feeling sick again from the night before. Landon and I decided to see "Winged Migration" at Fox Tower at 9:45. It was fantastic! I loved it! I would recommend anyone to see this documentery about the migratory flights of birds. It was very neat. I felt sick during the movie. Landon and I have decided that we're not going to buy beer/wine anymore. We're just going to limit our drinks to one when we are socializing. We hope this will make a big difference. I would like to quit drinkikng altogether, but we want to set a realistic goal for ourselves. So, we'll only drink one when we are going out with friends. After all, it's always the first drink that is the best anyway! I need to cut way back on my alcohol intake. I've been getting really sick lately from drinking too much, and it's not good for my health. So, this is what we're going to do. It's not good to be drinking every night like I do, and then on the weekends I've been drinking too much, and have been experiencing day long sickness, vomitting, nausea, and headaches because of it. Time to make a change!
Saturday, October 25, 2003
Went to Carol Smith's funeral with Cindy early this morning. We had poor directions, so were 30 minutes late. We only caught the last 15 minutes of the funeral, but I'm just glad we found it at all. I would have been upset if we couldn't have found it, because I wanted to pay my respects. It was sad, because there were only 20 people there at the most, and half of them were from work. I would hope there would be more people than that at my funeral. Not that I'll be around to care or see those people, but it is an example of how many people knew you or you shared your life with.

During the afternoon, I studied and worked on finishing The Blithedale Romance. We went over to Landon's parents at 5pm for dinner, and then everyone came over at 6pm-Mattie & Jodie, Gay, Leslie, Miriam & Mark, and their parents. It was a lot of fun. Landon and I had a chance to get to know Mattie & Jodie a lot better, and we had fun talking to them. The only problem is that I drank way too much. I think I had four or five glasses of wine, and then I drank 2 beers. I guess since I was sitting at the table talking to people, I just kept pouring glass after glass after glass.

It was fun giving Miriam & Mark all the things we bought for them. They really appreciated it, and it made me really happy to see Miriam going through all the things we bought for her.

We didn't get home until 12:30am.

Friday, October 24, 2003
Today was a nice fall day. The leaves were falling slowly in the park blocks. Classes were okay today, and I was handed my midterm assignment for Literary Criticism, which will have me buring the midnight candle many evenings this week. It's a tough one, and a 10 page paper at that.

I had lunch with Jen today (my old friend from PBC). She is married to my other good friend from PBC (also from Wales) Matt Williams. We had a nice conversation over bagel sandwiches, and then I took the bus home.

We met my sister Tracy & her husband Mike @ Kenendy School and saw "Once Upon a Time in Mexico." It was okay. Landon liked the movie better than I did. We ate pizza and drank beer during the movie.

Afterwards, we met Landon's co-worker Damien and his wife Laurie at Biddy's, as well as Amy, and ended up hanging out there and drinking beer until about 12:15am. I was glad we didn't stay any later, because I need to get up early tomorrow morning to go to Carol Smith's funeral. Very sad.

It was fun hanging out with Damien, Laurie, and Amy this evening. Funk Shui put on a good show, and it was fun watching people dance. There were some real characters out there!
Thursday, October 23, 2003
Today was a great day. Art History is getting better and progressively more interesting, the weather was beautiful, I felt better physically than I have for the past week, and life is feeling good. Landon had his review, and received a nice bonus, as well as a new salary. I love my husband, I love our cats and our life, and I love the plants and things in our apartment. I love the life we are making for ourselves. I love Portland, and I do love the rain here.

We had Mike & Susan over for dinner tonight. I made a roast, potatoes, and salad, and they brought over the bread, the beer, and the wine. It was a good dinner. I'm glad that Landon has such wonderful parents, and I am blessed to have such nice in-laws, who are really friends, not just in-laws.

After Mike & Susan left we walked to Swan Market and bought ice cream bars, wine, and 1554 beer, which is another one of the Fat Tire beers. They have Blue Paddle, Fat Tire, Porch Swing, 1554, and others...I can't remember all the names. All I know is that I really like this brand of beer a lot!

Now, it's back to the books. I'm happy about how my Intro to Linguistics homework went, and now I have to read some stuff for a class tomorrow morning.

Good night-Ciao Ciao!
Wednesday, October 22, 2003
Well, I'm kind of annoyed. I wrote a huge post, and then went to post it, but I didn't realize I was offline, so I lost the whole damn thing.

I don't think I have the motivation to retype everything I did before. It sure won't come out the way it did the first time. Essentially, I've been working for the past 2 hours to rid our apartment of the fungus gnats, which have thousands of larvae in my dining room plants. They live where the soil is moist. This is why they don't live in my living room plants. The soil dries out between waterings in the living room. In the dining room, the tropical plants all need to be kept moist, and are also misted daily. They are having a hay-day in there.

There are a number of things you can do to rid your plants of fungus gnats. My previous post explained all of these home remedies in detail. I don't have the time to retype it all over again.

I'll let you know if the remedies which will go unexplained here for today work, and how this turns out. All I can say, is I need the gnats to be gone. They are very annoying, even though they don't harm humans or plants. I've heard they look like dragons, though, under a microscope, which kind of creeps me out.

Tuesday, October 21, 2003
I still have a cough, but am feeling even better than I did yesterday, which is good. I hope to be back to normal by the end of the week. School was rough today. During American Fiction, there was drilling and machinery going during class, and we could hardly hear the professor (who by the way is one of the worst teachers I have ever had). Finally, this girl spoke up and said, "I hate to be rude, but this (the noise from the construction) is a little ridiculous." The prof. then dismissed us 10 minutes early, and no one left very happy, because the teacher is boring, and continues to do NOTHING about the noise of construction in the classroom. I mean, it's so bad we can't even hear the professor. I just read and do other things, because I can't even hear him over the noise.

Then, it was off to Art History. I turned in my huge paper I worked all day Sunday on, and then listened to the lecture on New Kingdom Egyptian art. It's a little more interesting than Paleolithic Art.

Things at work are very tumultuous right now. Barbara refused to let Susan come back, and now Jeanne is (regretably) our new manager. A lot of people are very upset about it, but there is nothing that we can do. Those that spoke their mind at the meeting were reemed for doing so, and those that didn't speak up at the meeting should have. I wasn't at the meeting on Friday, because no one let me know there WAS a meeting. I was very pissed I couldn't be there, because I would have said that which is on my mind. This situation was very poorly handled, and they will pay the consequences for their poor decision making. This hospital (I can not divulge where I work online) is going to lose a lot of good employees, and they definitely have already lost a lot of employees' respect and pride in the organization for which they work. It is a shame that people in leadership in organizations such as this one can simply make decisions to the detriment of those beneath them without thinking about ANYONE but themselves and their unjust motivations. It is a real shame.

Well, I'm going to make some chicken noodle soup for lunch, then I'm off to work. I must read half of The Blithedale Romance this evening, so the day is really not even halfway over yet, even though it is nearly 3pm. To get me halfway through this 19th century novel by Nathaniel Hawthorne, I will need to read 160 pages, and won't be able to start doing this until 9pm this evening when I get off of work.

Monday, October 20, 2003
I am so sad. Carol Smith, a very sweet lady from my department, died yesterday. She was in her fifties. I found out when I after I arrived to work, and it was very upsetting to hear the news of her death. We'll miss you, Carol-you were a very nice lady, and you will be missed.
I am feeling much better today. I still have a cough, but physically I feel a lot better than yesterday and last night.

I'm getting a little annoyed with this day and age of computers. Yes, they do serve their purpose, but a lot of people spend as much time or more on the computer than those people do who watch TV. The computer users have only found another distracting habit that takes away from living life to its potential. Now, the computer can be useful in many ways, but I know from first hand experience, and from watching others that in many ways it can be harmful. For one thing, there is the whole chatting online thing, which is a cheap way to communicate with family and/or friends if they live long distances, but then there are the online chats with strangers which lead to internet relationships, which lead to problems. I was reading an article online the other day about symptoms and signs that your spouse is having an online affair. This would include spending long amounts of time on the computer, quickly hiding screens when he or she walks into the room, never wanting to go out or spend long amounts of time away from the computer, etc, etc, etc...

I mean, look at the ways in which I use a computer-I use it for journaling. I am not journaling with paper and pen, but here online. This is useful to me, because I can type very fast, and have found that I journal now, but never kept it up before because it just took too much time to write my thoughts down.

I also use the computer to send/receive e-mails. If I don't get a certain amount of e-mails, I tend to send them out to ensure that I'll get some in return. It is about keeping in touch with people and keeping the lines of communication open. To me, e-mailing is faster than calling someone on the phone, so I tend to use e-mail as my primary mode of communication. When I was younger, I used to use the telephone as my primary mode of communication, and as my secondary mode of communication, it was writing letters.

Thirdly, I use the computer to read the news, and to get information online about certain subjects in which I am interested.

Lastly, I use the computer to update Quicken and my Fertility Awareness Program daily.

I learned from experience how addicting other uses of the internet are. Because of this, I no longer participate in online chats with strangers and am very opposed to internet dating. What happens is you become unnaturally connected to people. You feel guilty if you cannot check the posts at least several times per day. When I say unnaturally connected, I mean that the relationship (s) progress at a much faster rate than they would in real life. This is one reason I am highly opposed to internet dating. You tend to divulge too much of yourself to someone (s) that you have never met. Because of this, you feel intimately bound to these relationship (s). I do not feel this is a good thing. If you compare how people behave online to the way they behave in real life, chances are you'll see two different behavior patterns. For example, one person might be very introverted in real life, but online he or she divulges all to perfect strangers, but can't seem to do that with the friends and family all around them. This goes without mentioning that the hours upon hours in which one spends online is time spent AWAY from those family and friends. This also goes without mentioning that time online is time you are spending in your own little world. Now, we ALL need those things to help us to zone out every once in awhile, but there does come a point when too much is too much. A good book can draw you in and help you to live in a different world (the world inside the book) for a little while. Television also helps one to zone out. The computer is another one of those ways in which we zone out. The question you have to ask is when is too much too much? When you get to the point where you'd rather sit on the computer all day than motivate yourself to do anything else, is this the point where you ought to draw the line?

I used to chat online with my x-boyfriend for hours upon hours every single day. It was a long distance relationship, and to tell you the truth, the total days we spent together probably amounted to one month total. However, the hours and hours we spent online together totaled over a year. So, over a year, I was online for hours and hours every day, and not living my life. I will never get the year I was 22 back ever again. What I found out at the end of what I call an internet relationship (we did not meet online, but our relationship was restricted to the chat rooms due to distance), was that all I had was a set of falsehoods. Who I was online was not who I was in real life, and who he was online was not how he was in real life. Why do you think people freak out when the person they've been talking to online wants to meet? It's because they are scared that the person they've been talking to won't be the person they've been talking to online, and vise versa. It is also because you realize that this person you've been talking to online knows a hell of a lot more about you than anyone one else on the planet (which gives you a false sense of intimacy with that person), and all because you were talking to a fricking computer monitor-not a live person. Because this person knows so much about you, it is scary to think about seeing someone (who you may or may not have ever met personally) who knows quite a lot about you eye to eye. To me, this is NOT a natural form of closeness between two people.

When you're online, you're typing the part of your persona which you want the person on the other end of the communication to see. They can't see anything else but the part you let them see by what you type. In real life, no matter how you try to hide who you are from friends and family, the parts of you that are supposedly hidden do rise to the surface in unconscious movements of the body and insinuations in language, which slowly reveal to others parts of who you are. One thing that is dangerous about online relationships is that you are only divulging the one part of yourself that you know will spark what you want to get back in return.

Bottom line-I feel that groups which help to provide information that you are seeking are helpful. However, I do not believe that online friendships or lovers are a positive. This activity does not teach you to live. It does not teach you anything about being a social person. It is just you and your monitor. It's the same as talking to yourself with the person of your choice online who fits your ideal of the "perfect" listener or the "perfect" significant other, etc, etc, etc. Yes, it can be dangerous if you are stupid enough to let an internet relationship destroy your marriage or your life, but my primary concern is that it does not teach people to be honest with people who are IN THEIR LIVES. It does, however, condone opening up to people through a mode of communication in which there is not a person sitting across the table from you and looking you in the eye. This mode of communication condones PARTIAL expression of self to the unknown. I say partial, because the "unknown" does not see you day to day. That is, the people to whom you are engaging in heart to heart conversations with do not see the whole of who you are. They only see the part you type to them, and this is minus your living breathing self which in and OF ITSELF divulges quite a lot of information to anyone around you. No matter how hard you try to hide insecurity, for example, it becomes apparent in one way or another to those around you. It is pretty easy to hide insecurities when typing to a computer monitor.

All this to say, I am getting more and more disappointed with the engagement by many members of society in online chats and chatrooms that do not facilitate growth of a person as a part of community with others. Time online is time spent away from community. Yes, you can argue that chat groups are their own community, but are they really? Don't they take away from real life community, which is you and those around you (not those scattered all over the world logged into your chat group)?

What I'm trying to say is that it makes me angry when I hear people pursuing friendships online instead of in real life. It is almost like these chat rooms breed insecurity, because it makes you feel like you have friends who really know you, and then you are content to sit at your computer all day without actually going out and making a real friend in the world (or for that matter BEING a real friend to someone in the world). The people online that give you a sense of friendship and "being cared about" are not people you will probably ever meet. Even if you did, you probably wouldn't like them in real life, because their real life character would sharply contrast to what you interpreted them to be online. And, at the end of it all, you have nothing in the end, because who looks back and remembers the best internet friend they ever had? No one. People remember friends that can hug them and go out to coffee with them and smile at them and love them for who they are in person, not for who they are online. If you are really honest with yourself, you will realize that you don't really care deep down about the people behind the screen names online, but you do care about the people you can touch-those in your community and your family/friends.

Today, I condemn the internet and chat rooms, chat groups to the place of no return, and say this:
Why not the library?
Why not a phone call instead of an e-mail?
Why not a real life friend instead of a computer monitor?
And, why not be a friend to someone around you instead of putting those online above those that you love most?

Plato said representation was two removes from reality. To me, the relationships made online are definitely two removes from reality, and, in fact very far from reality.

We need to be approaching and striving for reality, not falling away from it as we approach something far removed from reality, which is, in fact, approaching the fictitious.

Sunday, October 19, 2003
I was so sick today. I got up at 7am, checked my e-mail, then realized I was still pretty drowsy from the Nyquil I took last night, so I went back to bed at about 7:45, and slept until 10am. When I got up, I worked all day on a Art History paper. It was so boring, but it had to be done. When I finished, it was about 8.5 pages (about 2500 words). I finished the paper at around 2:30pm, then laid down with a splitting headache. I fell asleep, then Landon woke me up. I went and took a hot shower to help me to feel better, then we left to go to Landon's parents for dinner & a movie, which we've been doing on a pretty regular basis now. Either Landon's parents (I'll call them Mike & Susan) come over to our place, or we go over to their house. Tonight, Mike made soft tacos. I didn't think I'd eat anything, but I did manage to put down one soft taco. I haven't eaten anything in the past two days aside from a few fruit leathers for some energy and I did manage to eat some chicken noodle soup this afternoon, and then of course, the soft taco. We watched Raising Victor Vargas. It was okay. It was entertaining. I never got bored or distracted during the movie, which is a good sign it wasn't that bad. I'm feeling really sick right now, so Landon and I are going to go home (I'm waiting for Mike & Landon to finish watching 60 minutes) and go to bed. I'm going to take some Nyquil. I sure hope I feel better tomorrow. My head feels like it's going to explode, I have a splitting headache, horrible cough that hurts my throat every time I cough, and chills. I have to go to school tomorrow regardless of how I feel, so that is why I want to go to bed now. If I get some good sleep tonight and take care of myself, I'm hoping my body will pay me back by letting me feel better tomorrow. I have to go for now. This weekend has come to an end. Ciao.
Saturday, October 18, 2003
I am so miserably sick.
The sore throat progressed into congestion/sinus pressure/cold/stuffy nose. Pretty much everything you can think of. It isn't even like a "normal" cold-it's like the worse kind. I was up all night because I couldn't breath. I had to sit up a lot to breath, which meant I couldn't sleep. I took a hot bath when I got out of bed in the morning, and then read for about 3 hours with Landon. We then went over to Landon's parents to go baby shopping for Miriam & Mark. We found a 2nd hand store that had very very nice things. We got them a LOT of nice stuff for only 130.00. Probably close to 20 outfits, as well as a carseat and a baby sling for walking. They are going to be excited when they receive all the nice things we are all pitching in to give them.

Landon and I came home to find the Oil Can Henry check in the mail, which was a great relief. I was beginning to wonder if we'd ever see that money.

Tongiht, we went out with my family for Shelly's birthday. Everyone was about 30 minutes late, so Landon and I ended up sitting outside for a long time waiting. We were finally seated, and shortly thereafter everyone arrived except for Kristi & Zac. They showed up over an hour late, because they stayed behind to nurse the baby. When they arrived, Kristi got upset that we'd ordered without waiting for them. I got very angry about this, because Landon and I had been waiting (very hungrily I might add) for over an hour, and to have someone be so selfish really upset me. Not only that, but they didn't say anything to me about the photo album I made for them and sent to McMinnville, which really hurt my feelings. I put a lot of time and energy into that and other things I have done for them, and I feel like my efforts are not appreciated. It is not a good feeling.

After the Spaghetti Factory fiasco, we drove quickly to Sherwood to catch a movie. We saw Intolerable Cruelty, which was slow, and in my opinion not very good. It was okay. I guess it's worth seeing once, but not for $8.00 at a theater that doesn't hand out student discounts.

I was miserable all through dinner, barely touched my food. In fact, all I ate today was three fruit leathers and two or three tortellini shells from my dinner plate, and a few bites of my salad. I'm just not feeling well, and my appetite is completely gone. All through the movie I was coughing and wheezing, and I had taken medicine right before the movie, which didn't seem to help at all. I'm going to take some Nyquil tonight, and I am hoping this will help me to sleep (somewhat) soundly.

Today was a good day, aside from being sick, but tonight was not very fun. Waiting all that time at the restaurant when you are sick, and then having the people who were late get mad because we didn't wait longer to order really upset me. Yeah, I know-you can't control how other people behave-you can only control your reaction. Whatever. Tonight, my reactions (feeling hurt and angry) was pretty darn hard to control.

Regardless, Happy 22nd Birthday, Shelly.
Friday, October 17, 2003
Hello Hello! Today, I woke up with a sore throat and symptoms of a cold.
After classes, I went grocery shopping. I bought food at Trader Jo's, and non-foods at Safeway. I also had to buy the coffee creamer at Safeway, because they don't have coffee creamers at Trader Jo's. After spending 140.00 between the two places, I came home, carried all of the groceries in the house, and put them away.

Tonight, Landon, Danny, and Zac are playing at County Cork. It should be a good gig. There was some stress earlier when Landon received an e-mail from Brongaene saying the original guitar player who was lined up (Bob) cancelled, and that Landon would be playing with Zac only. I called Cary Novotny and asked if he could find someone else to play with Landon. Luckily, Danny O'Hanlon was able to play. Landon and Danny already play together on Wednesday nights, so they are comfortable playing with each other, and I'm looking forward to the gig tonight. It's especially nice because Landon's parents are coming, as well as my sister Tracy & her husband Mike, and their daughter Haelie, some friends of Susan's, my friend Amy, some of Landon's co-workers, and maybe Sharla and some of her friends. Landon might have quite the audience!!!

We still haven't been reimbursed from Oil Can Henry's for my radiator. Every time I call the woman in the head office, she gives me some excuse, like-oh, I thought the checks were cut on Wednesdays, but it turns out they are cut on Thursdays. Then, Friday rolls around, and there's still no check in the mail, so I call back only to hear her say, "I thought it would be mailed Thursday, but as it turns out, the President gets the checks on Friday, and I dont' know if he's going to sign them today. This shit has been going on for 2 weeks now, and I'm getting really annoyed and border line angry about it. She is one of those people who tell the customer what they want to hear to get them off of her back, but what she doesn't realize is she is only going to have the customer on her back more by lying about the check in the first place. Uggghhhhhh...she is SO annoying! We'd better get the check tomorrow, but based on the history of this ordeal, I really doubt we will.

Oh, the woes of dealing with so called "customer service reps."
Thursday, October 16, 2003
Today was uneventful. Still doing lots of homework every day.

In Art History 204 today, I started shaking and feeling very sick. This was because I had only eaten one piece of toast for breakfast, and as it was nearly 2pm, my body started reacting. Usually, I'm fine until I get out of Art History, but not today! I had to leave class 10 minutes early and run to get some food. I could barely walk down the stairs of Neuberger, because I was so shaky! Once I get like that, it takes an hour or two until I start feeling better, even after I do eat food.

I was unable to go grocery shopping this afternoon, as I've been working on my linguistics homework. So, tonight it looks like I'm going to have to slap something together out of a lot of different things. We have broccoli, French fries, bagels, tuna fish, a little cheese, and some salad (no dressing). Hmmmmmm.....I think I'll make tuna melts on blueberry bagels with some undressed salad and some steamed broccoli! If we're still hungry, we can always make those French fries that have been in our freezer for about six months.

Alright, time to get back to linguistics.

Wednesday, October 15, 2003
Today has been a good day. I'm a lot less stressed, and I've accomplished a lot this afternoon in regards to my homework. I still have quite a bit of reading to do this evening, but as long as it's reading (not typing papers or working on the art project), I can sit on the futon with the cats, and drink wine, and just focus on reading closely. Reading closely is very important as an English major.

I'm starting to spend time pondering what vocation I am most interested in pursuing next year. One thing that is cool is that I found out I'm only 800 hours away from owning the retirement account Providence has been slowly building for me over the past four years. I didn't even know I had a retirement account, but I found out today that I have four vested years. The guy with the retirement program was very nice to me, and now all I have to do is work 800 hours next year (2004), and I will be all set to quit, collect, and begin a career doing something else. I'm pretty excited about the fact I'll get to walk away from Providence with an extra $6,000.00 (maybe a little less, maybe more).

Other than that, Landon and I just returned about an hour ago from NW Car Care, where we picked up his car. They had told Landon on the phone it would be 800 (plus a little extra for a part or two), and then when we got there, they said it was 950.00. We told them what the guy quoted us on the phone, and I guess the guy who did the work and the guy who called Landon got their wires crossed, but since the guy said 800 + a little extra, they had to give it to us at that price, instead of the price of 950.00, which I guess it truly cost. So, after signing over most of one of our paychecks, we are now back home.

We just finished eating dinner. I made egg salad sandwiches (on toasted wheat bread), tomato soup (with a little Parmesan cheese sprinkled on top), and fresh spring salad with mini-tomatoes, and ranch dressing (Landon accidently left our basalmic vinaigrette at work, so I had to resort to my 2nd favorite-ranch). It was a pretty good dinner.

I am now shutting down the computer, and going over to the futon to finish reading Charlotte Temple and I plan to drink a glass (or two) of white wine. That's all for now!

It's been a good day!

P.S. Highlight of the day-realizing my car keys were left in my car that Landon used today since his was in the shop, and having to climb up a tree and through the window of our apartment to get inside. Luckily, the safety lock was unlocked, so I was able to open the window far enough to actually fit my body through the window and into the apartment! It sure scared Felix seeing me crawl through the window!
P.S.S. 2nd highlight of the day-passing one of my professor's in the hallway and having him make eye contact and smile at me. That kind of made my morning that he remembered I was one of his students, and also took the time to smile. It's the little things that count.

Okay, that's really all for now!
Tuesday, October 14, 2003
Well, this is the beginning of the third week of the term, and school is definitely starting to get stressful. Stress always affects my body in a number of ways, and I am already seeing and feeling the effects of the stress. The next 24 hours are going to be stressful for me, because I have a paper to write, a book to finish reading (I'm only 1/3 of the way through), and 20 or so pages to read of Augustine (early philosopher).

Today is the dreaded Tuesday (also Thursdays), where I watch the clock as my professor drones on and on about Neolithic Egyptian Art. Not my cup of tea. I hope she sees the big word ENGLISH major next to my name when she grades my exams, so she'll know why I might have trouble recalling these terms, as I'm not an art historian, and have no intention or desire to know or retain what an art historian knows. Well, I'll retain what I have to for the exam, but prehistoric art is very ambiguous, because we don't know a lot of why they made this art, or what a lot of it means. It is really boring to me. I think I would have enjoyed studying any art from the past 400 years, but prehistoric is just plain boring to me. I can't even pretend to like it.

So, here we are. It is 2:40pm, and I need to finish eating lunch, do some quick reading, then head to work. Tonight and tomorrow will be very busy (and stressful) for me.

Monday, October 13, 2003
Interesting information from my Intro to Linguistics textbook:

Please count the number of F's in the following text:


"If you are like most people, your answer will be 3. That answer is wrong. The correct answer is 6. Count again. This time pay attention to the function word OF.
What this test illustrates is that the brain treats content and function words differently. Indeed, there is a great deal of psychological and neurological evidence to support this claim. For example, the effect that we just illustrated with the OF test is much more pronounced in brain-damaged people. Some brain-damaged patients have greater difficulty in using, understanding, or reading function words like IN or WHICH, but can read the lexical content words INN and WITCH. Other patients do just the opposite. The two classes of words also seem to function differently in slips of the tongue produced by normal individuals. For example, a speaker may inadvertently switch words producing "the journal of the editor" instead of "the editor of the journal," but the switching or exchanging of function words has not been observed. There is also evidence for this distinction from language acquisition. In the early stages of development, children often omit function words from their speech, for example, "doggie barking." These two classes of words have different functions in language. Content words have semantic content (meaning). Function words play a grammatical role; they connect the content words to the larger grammatical context" (Fromkin, Victoria. An Introduction to Language, Heinle Corporation, 2003).
Sunday, October 12, 2003
Landon and I stayed around the house most of today. We did some reading, then took an afternoon nap.

In the evening, we attended the Capercaillie concert at Aladdin Theater. It was alright, but didn't inspire either one of us. Landon says they're saying the same things, and playing a lot of the same things. I think music groups need to move forward with their music, so they don't appear to be sick of what they do.

Before going to the concert, we stopped at Arby's to try their new BLT (recommended by Landon's parents). It was pretty good, but I prefer my BLT's toasted, and these are untoasted. If you like untoasted BLT's, then Arby's makes great ones!

We were home by 10pm, and I did 10 pages of reading (Plotinus), drank a glass of wine, and then we both went to sleep after, of course, we watched the 11 o'clock news.

Tomorrow's the start of another week....

Saturday, October 11, 2003
I woke up sick and vomiting today, but it was my own fault, because I drank last night and ate little. Usually, when I drink w/out a lot of food in my stomach, I get really sick the next morning. I finally pulled myself out of bed at 1pm. I also had a pounding headache from the hangover. My abdomen ached pretty hard, also. It is such a MISERABLE feeling!

After I took a hot bath and got dressed, we met Sharla at Tony's Bento, our all time favorite lunch stop. By 3pm, we were home again. I looked through several magazines looking for the right short haircut, while Landon took a 2 hour nap. By 5pm, we were at Mike & Susan's for a hot (and good) roast beef dinner, with an excellent salad to go with it. By 6:10pm, I left for Salon in Vogue. Sky cut my hair, and did a pretty good job. I can't get over how short it is in the back, and it's always a real shocker after having heavy tresses for so long. She braided my hair, then whacked off the braid for me to donate to Dornbecher's Hospital to be used for their cancer patients. When she whacked off the braid, she accidently cut a little too close. That's okay, because she made it look cute, anyway. I'm still trying to get used to it, but I think deep down, I really like it. Landon, Mike & Susan all like it, so obviously it probably looks alright.

I didn't get back to Mike & Susan's until after 8pm, but everyone was still in the mood to watch "The Pianist," which we proceeded to do. It is a fantastic movie, regarding a very horrendous subject: The Holocaust. I feel strongly that it is important for people to subject themselves to the history of the Holocaust, and to really understand what took place, and question how and why it took place. It is very interesting to understand this, especially so one can look for the signs that build up to something like the Holocaust, so that perhaps some day this does not happen again. A lot of people delude themselves into thinking that genocide of the magnitude of the Holocaust could never occur again, but I believe it is just that: a delusion. I think people need to be aware. History does have a way of repeating itself, even though we tell ourselves it could not.

Well, it's late-11:18pm right now. Landon isn't tired because he took a 2 hour nap, but I'm pretty tired, and my body is wore out from the hangover. We all make mistakes with alcohol every once in awhile, (well, I like to think we ALL make mistakes, but maybe it is just me!)-but in the past I've always sworn to myself that I'll never ever let my body get sick from the effects of alcohol ever ever again, but after awhile, I forget how important it is to eat food before drinking 3-4 beers, and I assume that everything will be okay....only to wake up the next morning with a pounding headache, an aching abdomen, and a very strong urge to bolt to the bathroom to be sick. As I've said before, history has a way (after some time has passed of repeating itself).

On this great topic (vomiting), I will end this blog. Hopefully, I will have more uplifting topics to relay by tomorrow.

Actually, I do have one more thing about the history repeating itself. It's like a woman who has a baby. Now, every woman will tell you, "...if you remember the pain, you'd never have another baby..." I think over time, people tend to forget how horrible events really were, or they forget the ins and outs to the events, and this is why history ends up repeating itself (well, this and a million other reasons which I don't have the time to list here). Okay, see? I didn't end this blog on the vomiting topic. Well, now I have.
Bonne nuit, Karli
Friday, October 10, 2003
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After school, I cleaned the bathroom, the tub, and the rest of the apartment. By 4:30, Tracy and Kyla were at my apartment. They were waiting for Shelly to get there and drop off Kaenan (whom I was to watch this evening), and then they were all going to go to Kell's to hang out with their manager, since she is leaving. After Shelly arrived, they all left, and the 2-3 hours with Kaenan began. He was a very good boy the whole time. Aside from a couple mishaps (dumping out the fish food and unraveling all of the toilet paper onto the floor), everything went very smoothly. I did learn that Landon was tired when he came home, so didn't feel like playing with Kaenan. I hope he will want to play with our own kids some day, even if he is tired when he gets home from work. I think this is a common problem, though, with working parents.

Around 6:45, Landon left to go to County Cork, and 20-25 minutes later, I left with Kaenan to go there, also. On the way, Kaenan kept saying, "Kar, Kar," followed by "big build" which I took to mean the big buildings. He is a cute boy.

He was very good at the County Cork, and appeared to really like the music. He kept pointing at Landon, and kept smiling when he heard the changes in the music. I think it was a good experience for him.

Shelly, Tracy, Mike, and Kyla all arrived at around 8:30, and left shortly thereafter.

I hung out with Mike & Susan for awhile, then left to go meet Cindy at Biddy's. We stayed and listened to Funk Shui for a little while, then went over to the Twilight to meet her sister, who was there to hear a punk rock band. I only stayed for about an hour, and then left. My eardrums were hurting, and I decided that punk rock is definitely not for me. I guess I don't see it as music at all.

I was tired and had ringing eardrums when I got home.
Thursday, October 09, 2003
Today, I had a pretty good day. I had a lot of homework to do when I got home from school, so that's pretty much all I did. Classes were very long and boring. Tuesdays and Thursdays are my boring days. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays are my thought provoking days. I always look forward to every other day! I'm getting to the point now where I dread Tuesdays and Thursdays. Mostly, because my art teacher is such a mean *&*(&(!! She reminds me of a true school marm, or whatever they are called. That stereotypical stern teacher who carries around a stick (and she does-supposedly it is her pointing stick), and you wonder if she'd use it on you if you asked a stupid question. I hope not!

After school, I went up to OHSU and studied near their coffee shop for about two hours. After coming home, I made dinner (seafood and pasta) for Landon and I, then hit the books again. I worked on homework from 6pm until 11pm, not including the hours I spent at OHSU.

I woke up in the middle of the night to Felix snoring right next to me. He does this thing now where he stretches out vertically like Landon and I do, and sleeps right between our pillows. He thinks he is human or something, or that he has special rights to sleep in between us. I was very annoyed, so I made him sleep at the foot of the bed. He woke me up several times before I finally moved him. I didn't marry a snoring man (well, sometimes I do have to shake him), and I won't have a snoring cat in the bed. If you snore, you're out! I also get annoyed, because Felix rolls around a lot in the night, and I'll wake up, and his paw and his head will be taking up half of my pillow.

Felix looks very weird right now, because Landon cut all of the fur off of his tail. It now resembles a small short stick. Felix doesn't understand what it is, so he keeps attacking it, and Priscilla tries to pounce on it, too. Felix now spends long periods of time chasing his tail, and now appears to be even more disabled than he was before.

That's about it for now.


Wednesday, October 08, 2003
Today has been a good day. This is a quick synopsis of my day:
I woke up at 7:30am.
Took a bath.
Got dressed.
Packed Landon's lunch (ham & swiss sandwich)
Talked to Colleen in San Diego for about 20 minutes.
Ate a hash brown and drank a cup of coffee.
Walked to the bus stop.
Went to class (Literary Criticism & Intro to Linguistics)
Came home (bus was overcrowded)
Did the dishes
Made a tuna melt for lunch
Did art assignment over (I have to do it over, because the professor misinformed the class, but I figure after redoing the assignment, I'll be an visual analysis professional!!!)
Okay, we have now arrived to the present-nothing else has taken place yet in my day! So, I will contribute my opinion regarding governor-elect Arnold Schwarzenegger.

In my opinion (a mon avie), there is something seductive about voting for a celebrity. People feel a connection to Arnold because he has been an entertainer. On some level, there is this thing going on where people make character assessments about the actors they do or do not like, even though they know nothing about them. They only know what is portrayed to them on the big screen, and folks, I hate to break it to you, but it's only acting. The person displayed on the big screen has nothing to do with who they are in real life. This is why I think it is very scary that people have voted for Arnold based on some emotion inside that pulls their hearts into believing that this guy (this actor) can be a leader and govern the state of California. I feel Arnold won first and foremost for his popularity in the movies, but secondly, because people tend to feel connected in some weird way to actors and actresses, forgetting that what they are feeling connected to is this: THE CHARACTER THEY PLAY ON THE SCREEN. What you see in the action movies is not reality. That is, the guy you feel connected to in the movies is not Arnold, it is his character. So, California has voted in Arnold Schwarzenegger based on their emotions for his character. The decisions to mark his name on the ballots has mostly to do with the popularity of his role as ACTOR, and little to nothing to do with is abilities as a LEADER and GOVERNOR. Will California be better off with Arnold Schwarzenegger instead of Gray Davis? This remains to be seen, but I can't help thinking that it is the lack of determination on the part of voters to pursue knowledge about who they are really voting for when they vote that is, for the most part, largely responsible for the unsatisfactory results we live with when it comes to measures wrongfully being passed and politicians who have no business whatsoever being in leadership getting elected. We need to ask ourselves what it is that sways the decisions we make on the ballots when we go to the polls. Is it because we feel connected to the character Arnold Schwarzenegger plays in the movies? It is because George W. Bush says on national television that he is a Christian? Is it because we fall for propaganda (ideas, facts, or allegations spread deliberately to further one's cause or to damage an opposing cause)? (Merriam-Webster, Online) Granted the truth is hard to find, but how can we vote in good conscience without ever pursuing the truth regarding the politicians and measures for which we vote? I don't know what is worse: voting irresponsibly or not voting at all. One thing for sure, it's irresponsible voting that results in a lack of democracy. It isn't our choices that are putting people into office, or passing measures, but the choices of those who are submerging the masses in propaganda, or the choices WE MAKE with our emotions, and not our minds. Therefore, democracy is failing us, but it is because of us that it is failing. As stated online at a historical site about Hitler's rise to power, "Where there is a failure of democracy, there is usually a lack of democracy." Do we ever learn from our mistakes? Aren't we still capable of letting another Hitler get a hold of the reigns of power? Somehow, history is always repeating itself.

Tuesday, October 07, 2003
Today was a bummer:
I have to redo my art project.
Even though the teacher told the class, "Pick out anything in the book...," what she meant to say is, but make sure you only pick something out of the first 1/3 of the book. Since I picked out 19th century artist Van Gogh, I have to redo the assighment. You'd think the prof would say, "This was my mistake, therefore, for those of you who chose something out of the end of the book, you won't have to redo the assignment." Not this prof! She's really stern, and you have to do what she says or else, basically.

So, that's what I have to do-redo the assignment.

After I got off of work, Patrick (Colleen's younger brother), Cindy, and her sister Kelly, and Landon went to Laurelthirst for beers and open mic. It was pretty fun. By 11:15pm when I got home, I was more than ready to hit the sack, but I did read for 20 minutes before going to sleep. I have to have Horace read by tomorrow, so I started on the intro, and will finish the rest tomorrow morning.

Oh, and this day got off to a really bad start, because the painters woke me up at 7:15am this morning when they were talking right outside of our bedroom window. I pounded my fist on the window, and they went away, but that is NO WAY to start your day, I'm telling you!

Today hasn't felt much better than yesterday.

Monday, October 06, 2003
Today was filled with frustration! I went to classes, which went well, and I learned a lot. Then, I no sooner walked in the door of my apartment, and the stupid painters showed up, and started scraping the window RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME while I was eating my lunch! I gave him a dirty look, stormed out of the room, and called the rental agency. They didn't "hire" these guys. The owner privately hired them, and they have been left unsupervised all summer long. They come and go as they please, and do whatever the heck they want. They have no respect to our privacy whatsoever. What's more, I thought they had left, so I laid down for a short nap. I had just drifted off, when they started scraping a window so loud, it filled up my whole apartment with the most unnerving scraping sound. I was so frustrated. I sat myself down, and told myself, "Karli, choose to NOT be in a bad mood right now." I went and bought myself an iced tea, then went to work. I trained Patrick all night, so now I'm getting ready to leave work. I'll go home and finish reading Hawthorne for my American Fiction class tomorrow. I'll be stopping by good old Swan Market to get a bottle of chardonnay to relax my nerves from the painters. I basically am very angry and resentful of the privacy of which they have robbed Landon and I this whole summer, and now into October. They are disrespectful unprofessional men who are robbers of privacy. I almost hate them! I wish they would just go away! I think if they do one more thing, I'm going to unleash my anger on them, and they'll be sorry!
Sunday, October 05, 2003
Today...what did we do today? You ever try to remember what you did (even 12 hours later), and it seems to have slipped out of your mind? Well, let me do my best at explaining what we did today.

We (that is, Landon and I) woke up to the noise of the painters working on the building. Therefore, I woke up on the WRONG side of the bed. Hearing the painters scrape paint off of the window right above my head not only struck me as highly disrespectful of my sleep at 8am on a Sunday morning, but also hit the wrong nerve-that is, the nerve that cringes when a scraping sound is heard. After drinking my coffee, going online for awhile, and wasting some time, we got dressed and headed down to Milwaukie Blvd. to check out a house that was listed on the market this weekend. Perfect house, just no money in savings to pay closing costs, so we had to choke on the fact that we can't buy "our house," and accept that "our house" might very well be some other house, and that this house might not be "the one." So, we cried (briefly) and headed down to Kinko's, so I could blow up my chosen work of art.

After encountering the PORTLAND MARATHON, and having to do a very illegal maneuver in the car, we were able to get around the marathon, and onto I-405 headed to NW Portland. I did know of a Kinko's in NW without 12,000 individuals crowded around it.

After dealing with Kinko's, and their crap, we decided we were in the mood for lunch at 11:30am. What were we thinking? Ever ordered a quesadilla (I know, it's not spelled right!), and stared at the chicken one second too long, only to realize it looks like the intenstinal secretions of some kind of wild animal? Well, that was my experience. After chewing three times on a piece of chicken, and realizing it was unchewable, I decided the chicken looked and tasted disgusting (to say the least), so I did not finish my lunch, and we left unsatisfied, and wishing there was an easy way to get what we did eat out of our bodies.

We went home. Unable to reach Cindy (who had volunteered to assist me with my art homework), we laid in bed and read for awhile trying to doze off for some R & R. Sleep eluded us, so we tickled each other for awhile, then decided to go for a drive. By the way, when I say we tickled each other, this does not carry any other meaning other than we tickled the daylights out of each other for about 2 minutes. By then, we were both wide awake. We are both highly ticklish.

After exploring a neighborhood in SW, and finding out once again that the houses are too expensive, we headed to Meier and Frank to buy the following items:

1. New bathmat for bathroom (very pretty blue). P.S. NEVER, I repeat NEVER buy a white bathmat. That would be the one I am replacing with the new blue one. Unfortunately, unless you want to bleach your white bathmat weekly (don't we all have enough laundry to do without doing that?) it will always look more like a gray color, and not white. If you wanted it to look gray, wouldn't you just buy a GRAY BATHMAT??? My point exactly-so, don't buy a white bathmat!
2. New vinyl shower curtain (goes inside the decorative one for those of you who think that the decorative one can stand alone-it can't! You have to have the inner vinyl shower curtain, then the decorative one, or just the vinyl, but not just a decorative one!
3. New sheets for our bed.
4. New plaid fleece blanket for Karli to wrap up in on the futon while reading homework assignments.

We came home again.
Cindy came over.
Cindy and I worked on my art project while sipping on Malibu and pineapple juice.
I lit all the candles in our apartment.
Cindy left.
Landon made dinner.
I ran to Hollywood Video to rent "Of Mice and Men."
We ate dinner-it was baked potatoes (with all the fixin's) and soup (clam chowder for Karli and vegetable soup for Landon).
We sat down on the futon, and Felix laid in between us.
We watched "Of Mice and Men."
I decided to update my blog.
I am now finished updating my blog.

Saturday, October 04, 2003
Today we accomplished a lot. Landon, Mike, and I replaced the radiator on my car. It was about a 3 hour job. It was hard work, and at times mind boggling, but because we had Mike there to help us, we were always able to get the help we needed. We only had to run to Thrifty Auto Supply twice. Once to pick up the radiator, and twice to pick up transmission and anti-freeze solutions.

After finishing with the radiator chore, Landon and I headed to Oil Can Henry's to complete the paperwork to file our claim, so we can get reimbursed for the cost of the radiator and parts, as well as our labor. We are going to ask for 75.00 x 2 hours. It would have taken a knowledgeable mechanice 2 hours to do this job, so we are charging them for 2 hours, not 3.

Landon and I then went home and took a short nap, then got up and got ready to go to THAI THAI with Mike & Susan. First, we drove to the Sellwood neighborhood to check out a couple of houses, then we went to Mike & Susan's, and we all headed down to THAI THAI. The food was great!

Afterwards, we went to Mike & Susan's to watch "The Dancer Upstairs." This was not a great movie, which was disappointing to me, since I had high hopes with John Malkovich (my favorite male actor) as the director. Oh, well!

Susan and I enjoyed Malibu & pineapple drinks. Landon has a terrible cold, so did not drink any, and I guess Mike had had some liquor earlier in the night, and so also missed out on the great drinks.

It is a late night, and we are very tired. Time for bed!
Friday, October 03, 2003
Today, I studied Aristotle in Literary Criticism. Aristotle saw literature as having a beginning, middle, and end. This is very obvious to us, because Aristotle's ideas have been conventionalized. Aristotle posits conventional ways of setting limits. Plot, character, theme, diction, music, and spectacle, with the latter three being the medium through which the first three are represented. What makes a tragedy a tragedy is that we take the main character seriously, whereas the central character of a comedy is not someone we take seriously. We decide whether or not to take a character seriously by the decisions he or she makes. All of this (Aristotle's teachings) has been conventionalized throughout history, and is now the foundation of all literature, films, and theater productions.

Now about my day: Today, I read for 30 minutes in Seattle's Best (reading Aristotle) before class, then went to class, then came home. Right now, I am planning to begin homework, then will head to Fred Meyer's to buy ingredients to make Gyro sandwiches. Should be easy. You just fry up the steak slices with some onions, then use whatever spread you like for your cone Gyro sandwich.

Landon isn't feeling well today, so we plan to close our windows tonight in our apartment to cut back on the amount of chills he experiences throughout the night from the drafts. Felix was also very naughty last night, and woke Landon up several times. Now, we all know that if you are awakened several times during the night, which breaks up your sleep pattern, deep sleep never really occurs, and you somehow wake up feeling very tired and unrested. No amount of coffee can undo a night such as this.

Oh, the sacrifices of owning a mentally disabled cat!!!

Thursday, October 02, 2003
What is the purpose of pictures? Why do we take them, and why are they significant within our culture? Does anyone look at the pictures we take with the same appreciation as the one who either took the photo or is in the photo? Why do we compile thousands of pictures over the course of a lifetime, only to see them go into a bookcase never to be looked at again? Do we, the picture takers, enjoy these pictures during our lifetime? What purpose do they serve? A photograph is perishable. It will not survive over time. Neither will we. Why do having pictures in our computer hard drive or on our book shelf make us feel more secure? For sentimental purposes? What gratification do we get from having ourselves printed on a hard copy? We can NEVER relive the days in the photographs ever again. At the moment we snap a photograph, we decide the moment is worth preserving, but the truth is this: only the person who was there at the moment the photograph was snapped will understand the meaning behind the photograph. An objective viewer of the photograph might very well assert his or her ideas about why the photograph is significant, but he cannot really know the true significance any more than we today understand the significance behind cave art. We can't know why the images we look at in caves today were important to people thousands of years ago. We don't know what their day to day lives were like, nor can we expect that our own suppositions or assertions about what they might have felt when they made this art could have been. It is impossible to know what is unknowable. Pictures portray a moment in time, however, they cannot transfer the feelings, emotions, and day to day lives of the people of the photographs. It seems as though human beings want to believe that their life will be significant. We try to etch into a hard copy, if you will, a representation of a moment that will never be again. We want to believe that our children, and our children's children, and their children will cherish our lives after we are long gone. However, the reality is that reality is here and now. Snapping it in a photograph will never make the here and now real every again. We live moment to moment, and accumulate our memories, then die. Those things die with us. Photographs then become nothing more than the services of a taxidermist: a stuffed animal. It was once a living, breathing thing, but now sits and looks with glass eyeballs. It is an empty carcass to the viewer. Photographs are much of the same thing: empty to anyone who wasn't there that day when someone said, "Let me grab the camera."

Art History is going to be the dreaded class this term. I am really not interested in prehistoric art, especially taught from the voice of a professor who never cracks a smile or changes her voice inflection. Very boring. Ever watched the clock tick? I do in this class. The minutes go by so slowly I swear the clock must be broken. We listen to her drone on and on about art hisory, and if we're lucky, she'll put a slide on the wall (cave art), and we'll look at it while she continues to drone on and on about the theories of why these primative humans would have created art. Do I CARE? No! I am definitely not EVER EVER EVER going to be an art historian.

Now, ask me why Kate Chopin chose to write "The Story of an Hour" in 1894, and I can give you a lot of information, and I'd also be interested to hear what you have to say. But, ask me why ancient man created art-I don't care, and I don't know if I ever will. Yes, they are pretty to look at, but I don't know or care if the etchings are "Hunting Magic" or "Art for Art's Sake." Please let this be finals week! I don't want to sit for four hours a week!

Get this-I have to write a 1500 word paper on ONE PIECE OF ART! I have to talk about the shapes, what the image is saying, the scemata of the work. I can write papers on literature, but I will dread and hate every minute of writing a paper about one work of art. What will I say? What will I do? :(

My other three classes are very enjoyable. There is always that "one" class, if you will, that becomes the thorn in the student's side. C'est la vie.

Tonight, I am going to a free movie at Lloyd Cinemas for donating 3 cans of food. I am going with Sharla.

Later, I will drive to Edgefield with Susan (Landon's mom) to hear Landon play in the wine bar. A glass of wine is just what I need today (actually every day-ha!)
Wednesday, October 01, 2003
I had a good day at school today. Literary Criticism is one of my favorite classes. The professor is very intelligent, and I could listen to him talk on the subjects of Plato and the location of reality all day long. Plato's "Republic" is very interesting, and posits that poetry is two steps from the truth, because there is truth or form, then there is the representation of truth, then there is the poetry's re-presentation of the representation. 2 steps from truth. Copy of a copy of the truth. Truth is original form. Words are arbitrary. Poets seduce men by appealing to their lowest form of life: passion.

Highlight of the day: I went to shake the basalmic vinegar, but the lid wasn't screwed on tightly. I ended up with basalmic vinegar all over the wall, plant, and table.

Bummer of the day: Walking on my bruised heel at PSU and carrying my 110.00 Art History book around all day. It's about four inches thick.

Moderately interesting occurance of the day: Talking to the painters about when our screens will be put back in our windows so we can get some fresh air going through our apartment.

Hardest moment of the day: Running 1/2 mile at Metro YMCA track with Landon at 7:30pm.


Inspired Writings:
You were the embodiment of the essence of the desires which lied deep in the confines of my soul. Two things: black and white-you were both. You embraced the darkness of my being, but also cherished the brightest parts. You are what I need. You are what I love. A perfect match is not cliché. We are a perfect match, grounded firmly in the foundations of friendship. You and me: we are two comrades cut from different cloth that look great together. As two pieces of fabric compliment each other in any given pattern, so are we. If the word marriage was meant for any two people, it must have been meant for us, because we, the two of us, can do marriage. Marriage looks great on us. We embody love, and love embodies origin. This is our foundation.

K. Kuhn
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